We have all heard people say, "I felt kinda down in the dumps once, but then I just pulled myself up by my bootstraps and went on with my life".
Honestly, I can't think of one authentic, scientific illness that can be "bootstrapped". Meaning, I know of no measurable sickness that can be simply escaped by the sheer will of not wanting to be sick.
PPD is a measurable, scientific, authentic illness, as sure as cancer, diabetes, heart disease, parkinsons, etc... It is NOT simply being "down in the dumps". It is an illness that was brought on at a specific point in time, during a specific physical event, has specific treatment protocol, and a specific end.
Right now. Right this moment. I want you to take all of the guilt you may be feeling or doubt that's been tumbling around in your head since you heard someone say these ignorant words to you about choosing to cheer up, or pulling yourself up, or deciding to be happy, blah blah blah...(the list is eternal) And, now, I want you to visualize yourself holding all that junk in your fist. Now chuck it! As hard as you can, as far away from yourself as you can. It's not yours to deal with anymore. It's someone elses' messy ignorance. Let them have it back.
Now, visualize yourself on a hospital bed, wearing a hospital gown. Maybe spooning up some yummy orange jello. (yummo). Do you have it pictured? OK. This is what you really are right now. Even though you put on your same old clothes. You drive around in your same car. You are trying to look the same and sound the same and act the same. But inside you know, YOU ARE NOT YOUR SAME SELF RIGHT NOW. Who you are right now, is a woman that is sick with a devastatingly difficult illness. One that could kill you as easily as cancer could if it goes untreated. Right now, you are a patient in need of attention, care and treatment.
The reason it's important to see yourself this way right now is because you will automatically shift from shaming yourself with a heavy load of guilt and condemnation, to seeing yourself with compassion and empathy. You would never refuse help to a cancer patient laid up in the hospital if they were calling for you as you wandered by. So now, see yourself as that patient. Reach out for help. Don't hide behind the guilt some ignorant people have heaped on you.
Have compassion on yourself and understand that this is an medical illness that is treatable. Recovery is there with the right help. Recovery is not ever going to be found at the "bootstrap" level with this one. Find help and be OK with receiving it.
